we finally said our goodbyes from the dinner, and headed to the hotel. i handed the best man a note to give to neil in the morning. he pocketed it and smiled – and it was all i could do not to give him a bear hug and start crying right there.
retreating to our hotel rooms I found myself alone with my thoughts, but not for long. dawn, sara, lucy, and erin all left their respectful others and sat on the bed with me talking about their wedding day. it was a pajama party i will never forget. being surrounded by these beautiful inspiring women who were all married and independent and strong and wonderful. telling stories about their emotions as they walked down the aisle. and it was my turn next. it was to be a big day.
i tried to sleep. i don’t remember if i did.
the alarm sounded at 5am. an hour of the morning no one should ever be up to see. i was awake. my sister in the next bed mumbled something and threw her pillow over her head (she had decided to stay with me for both my benefit and hers) and i silenced the alarm and headed to the shower. i stood there in the hot water for a long time. my throat hurt, i felt horrible. neil and i had been popping cold pills for the better part of a week – and i’m sure the excitement of the day didn’t help. so i stood there. in the shower. with the hot water and steam and waited until my throat felt better. waited to collect my thoughts and gather myself. my emotions. my logic. my better half. i stood there in the shower a long time.
today, i am getting married.
when i finally got out i had turned the bathroom and part of the hotel room into a sauna. my sister had already barged in and complained about something (we’re not morning people in this family.) the air cleared, and we got to see outside – the wonderful, gorgeous, pouring rain. here we go.
the girls started arriving at my room, and pretty soon it was turned into ground zero. sara was there (looking quite a bit more chipper and alive than either me or dawn) and soon laren showed up with her glorious makeup case, and lucy and erin came with their suitcase full of hair products. my mom arrived bearing the best gifts of all – coffee and mimosas for everyone.
after dawn finished explaining to me the science behind the fact that in order for a hair dreyer to work, you must actually push the power button (i admit this complete lack of logic might have been a give away that i was a little more scattered than i thought at the time) i got in my zip up hoodie (so not to ruin my hair), my pajama pants (so not to ruin my zen level) and laren did my makeup while erin gave me a wonderful head of curls. sara and lucy took care of my sanity checks, and in a little under an hour everyone in the room was glamorous, gorgeous, and ready to hit the road. which was good, since the limo was waiting. i put on my pink and purple skull and cross bone rain boots, and we all headed out.